Bollywood Movie Review - Kites

DIRECTOR: Anurag Basu
ACTORS: Hrithik Roshan, Barbara Mori, Kangna Ranaut, Nicolas Brown, Kabir Bedi, Yuri
RUN TIME: 140 mins
CERTIFICATION: U/A

After being bombarded by endless marketing, the much awaited bollywood movie Kites remains a disappointing film, despite the heavyweights involved. Right from superstar Hrithik to producer Rakesh Roshan, who has himself delivered a series of hit films, to Anurag Basu, a competent next generation director not to forget Barbara Mori, the latest of a seemingly endless series of firangis who demand our attention with their curves and carefree ways. Hey, hang on, what happened to all our beautiful Indian actresses, huh.

The major problem with bollywood film Kites is its mixed parentage, which leaves you feeling cold as a viewer. The film lacks soul, while none of the characters really reach out and connect with you. That’s probably because the film is a mix of Hindi, English and Spanish with subtitles, while it has a story that has been told often before. The only difference in Kites is that the film is totally situated abroad, but the story is the same old Bollywood yarn shot in fancy locations stuffed with cool looking people in designer clothes.

Hrithik plays Jay, a Los Angeles based hustler with a hat, who teaches dance by day, song coming up, while waiting to strike it rich at the casinos. As he looks for the jackpot, he sells DVDs and for a fee, marries immigrants looking for a green card. So far he has done 11 fake marriages. One of his ditzy students, Gina Grover [Kangna Ranaut] falls for him, and proceeds to reveal it in true psychopathic style. One evening Hrithik lands home to find Kangna there. Turns out she stole his key, made a copy, broke in and now wants to clean up his dirty house. Whaaat? A zapped Hrithik thows her out, till he sees her stretch limousine parked outside. Oooh, she is loaded, being rich casino owner Bob Grovers’ [Kabir Bedi] daughter. So he starts wooing Kangna for her money.

Hrithik gets invited for Kangna’s brother’s marriage to their fancy palace by the sea. Brother Tony [Nicolas Brown], who speaks and dresses like a real bad dude, is about to wed the luscious Natasha [Barbara Mori]. Turns out Barbara was earlier Linda, a Mexican immigrant, and one of the 11 women Hrithik had married. Well, now he falls hopelessly in love with her, for reasons unexplained. Since Barbara only speaks Spanish and the couple can’t even have a basic conversation, my guess is it’s pure lust, surely a worthy cause. So they run off, leaving an enraged Tony to chase them all over America. Now, for the rest of the film, there are non-stop action sequences, as Tony and his thugs chase the runaway couple. Kangna disappears, while the couple get involved in a bank hold up, a hot air balloon ride till they finally end up being chased by bounty hunters, cops and brother Tony. In between, the duo romance in a jungle, even get married in her village in Mexico, but their romance doesn’t quite spark off. After lots of repetitive sequences, the film ends with our hero denied his victory.

Kites is shot beautifully, produced lavishly and has some decent action sequences. However, the music remains average, while the background score is a bit too operatic. The major problem however, remains the ordinary story, and the garbled screenplay that follows. Hrithik looks and acts like a bronzed god, Barbara sizzles in the right parts, while Kangna should stop playing psychopathic any more, though she is clearly a natural. In the end Kites suffers from trying to cater to a diverse audience, Indian and international, which is the latest fad amongst the big boys of Bollywood. It’s a bit like eating makke ki roti with salsa, which may be novel, but is definitely not tasty.

-- REVIEW BY: MINTY TEJPAL

Shah Rukh Khan plays old man!!

IF Shah Rukh Khan’s portrayal of an old man in the movie Veer Zaara left you wanting for more, then here’s something to look out for. In an upcoming ad for Dish TV, SRK has plays a 75-year old man who romances his wife behind closed doors by dancing with her. Anurag Basu, of Kites fame, who’s directed this ad says, “The story is very cute. Tanvi Azmi plays Shah Rukh’s wife. They’re hiding inside their room and are dancing.”

Anurag, together with adman Prasoon Joshi, the brain behind the concept, planned the look and the ad. “We didn’t know if SRK would agree to the idea. I didn’t want to make him Veer Zaara old. It had to be different. So, pehle Shah Rukh ko buddha banaya humne pictures mein, and then showed it to him. He was very sporting and loved the idea,” says Anurag.

Yes, this is Shah Rukh, and this is how he’ll look when he turns 75! The actor plays an old, bald man in an upcoming ad for Dish TV.

While his contemporaries are playing college students in movies, isn’t it a leap of faith for SRK to add 30 years to his real age? Prasoon says, “He liked the script a lot. He probably never got a script like that before. His first reaction was, ‘Well, I love it!’ He probably trusted my work. He didn’t take time to say yes.” Prasoon adds, “Everybody has been going ‘wow’ over the ad. SRK has emoted really well. There is beautiful chemistry between him and Tanvi Azmi.”

The bald look in the ad, says Shah Rukh, was something he was excited about since he’s very sure that he’d never lose hair in real life! When asked how his wife, Gauri Khan, reacted to the way he looked, Anurag responded, “Shah Rukh called his make-up guy and gave him the brief for how to do his look. After the whole get-up was done, he did something very cute. He took a picture of himself and sent it to Gauri on the phone, asking, ‘Will you still love me when I am old and look like this?’ I am sure he will look much more handsome when he is old!”